March 01, 2010

Fear: Get Used to It?

Fear: "Get used to it"

Last weekend, I led a retreat for a group of women who invited me to Maine. When I arrived, I unpacked my car eagerly, excited about what was to come. I knew my material was strong and I was confident in my abilities to facilitate the group.

On Friday we had a potluck dinner, during which it hit me - unlike past retreats I've led, I didn't know any of these women and they didn't know me. Michelle (whose letter is posted below) had been referred to my website, and invited her friends to join in the weekend. It was trust in Michelle - not me - that brought them there. Gulp.

Sleep eluded me as I turned the Saturday program over and over in my mind. After an early morning rewrite, I opened on Saturday morning by sharing the fear I had faced during the night, as well as some of my personal story (it hasn't always been dreamy, I assure you). Sleep-deprived, humbled, and with fear as my companion, I felt relief as a sense of trust and connection grew in support of what proved to be a phenomenally powerful weekend.

One woman, who had been an actor in New York, shared that she had asked her acting coach what to do about the fear she felt every time she got on stage. His answer was, "Get used to it." How's that for concise?

Fear can be minimized, but it won't disappear entirely. To be bigger than your fear, its presence must be integrated. Expected. Ideally, even welcomed.

There are many who advocate the elimination of fear, but it's important to remember that brave people are not without fear. If they were, what in the world would they need bravery for?!?

Brave people are those who have learned to work with fear. Rather than spend your energy in an attempt to abolish fear, what if you "got used to it" instead?

Fear exists. Maybe it's not an evil culprit that's holding your dreams hostage after all. Maybe fear doesn't need to be eliminated in order to do what you want. Invite bravery to join your fear, and possibilities will abound!

I know that bravery has played a huge role in my own breakthroughs. Now, I am eager and actively seeking the next opportunity to lead a "Birth Your Dreams" retreat to another group that I meet upon arrival. Will it be for you and your circle of friends?

Call on your bravest self today. May your dreams always inspire more than they intimidate.

Email Tara@createyourlifeinc.com or call (401) 569-7017.

Will Travel For Dreams

"Birth Your Dreams"Retreat Weekend
Friday evening - Sunday afternoon
Your town, U.S.A


Contact Tara for details.

Thank you so much Tara for creating such an inspiring "Birth Your Dreams" retreat at my home in Maine. I have done a lot of transformational work over the years, but I have never done it with a group of my friends, or in my home (or anyone's home for that matter). I have always paid my fee, showed up at the hotel or training site and did my work with a group of strangers.

But this weekend...was just magical and abundant. Besides the amazing work that you guided us through for ourselves, it enriched and deepened all of the friendships for everyone at the retreat.

Take your work on the road....the world is ready for you. As I get closer to meeting my loving, wiser, older woman, it is always a delight when someone younger than me can be my teacher. You are wise beyond your years and I am proud to have been your student.

With great respect for your gifts,

Michelle Surdoval
Scarborough, Maine

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